Diary of a frustrated Mason. Day 1
No meetings for 4 months! How will I cope? Found a strange women in the house. Apparently she’s my wife. Seems pleasant enough though. We ate dinner last night, but she didn’t do any toasts.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 2
The good lady of the house tells me I don’t need to say, ‘Inquire who seeks admission’, every time someone knocks on the front door. I have now won the raffle two nights in a row – with only two of us in the place, what are the chances
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 3
The dog barked today. I looked up and stated, ‘I acknowledge the correctness of your bark, see who seeks admission’ Would you believe it, yet another raffle win – this is getting embarrassing ….
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 4
I have received a warning letter from Royal Mail. Apparently, shouting imposter then swinging an axe at the postman is not the done thing. Another raffle prize – despite putting it back, I still won it.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 5
3 spiders came round for dinner. I proposed the visitors toast. Visiting is the life blood of Freemasonry – but in the current climate, ‘Not visiting’ may actually be the life blood! Is anybody else buying raffle tickets, or is it just me?
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 6
Tip of the day – normal wine glasses should not be used as firing glasses. As an aside – can anybody give me a lift back from A & E? I won the top prize in the raffle last night – a toilet roll.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 7
Things are getting bad. I’ve talked the dog into completing an application form for Advancement. Told him he could eventually become the Worshipful Barkster. The cat was one number out in last nights raffle.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 8
The wife is not happy with the new black and white chequered carpet, but that’s probably more so because I painted it on the existing carpet … The cat thinks I’m fiddling the raffle
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 9
I have been reminded by my good lady that Feng shui does not mean I can rearrange the living room to look like a Masonic temple. I didn’t buy a raffle ticket last night and still won!
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 10
Some more good advice – a claw hammer does not make a good substitute gavel. Also – is anybody selling a dinner table? I gave the raffle prize away to the wife, but she donated it back for tomorrow’s raffle.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 11
I have invested my two dogs as Senior and Junior Wardens. The three cats are the overseers. The 2 rabbits and 2 hamsters deacons, Inner Guard and Tyler. Whilst the cats are unimpressed, the dogs think they’ve now got a chance at the raffle … which I won again last night.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 12
Got up to turn the TV off. I squared the room to do it. My granddaughter’s geometry set of Square, compasses and a kitchen knife are now on the wall by the front door, a tin of Heinz baked beans (keystone Label) are on the table in front of my chair. The cats took the dogs raffle tickets out last night, and I won again.
Diary of a frustrated Mason – Day 13
The wife gave notice of motion that tomorrow she would be proposing a shopping trip. Despite a trawl through the BoC there is nothing to prevent this. Still it’s an opportunity to buy more raffle prizes – which incidentally I won last night.